Summer: Time for Dreaming, Exploring Boundaries, Nurturing Awareness

Summer offers a break in routines, a chance to explore, relax, have adventures and spend time with family and friends. Kids can daydream, play, enjoy hobbies and use this break to discover things about themselves, their world and the people around them. Here are a few wonderful “summer reads” for kids. Each one is a winner.

Someday by Eileen Spinelli and illustrated by Rosie Winstead strikes a dreamlike tone through its delicate collage illustration. Using a classic style of repetition, Spinelli highlights the broad possibilities pairing various Somedays and Todays. A young girl shares her dreams for the future and contrasts them with ways she spends her days. Unbridled imagination infuses her dreams for her future. But this celebration of possibility does not diminish her willingness to live her todays with joy and adventure. This provides a balance of finding contentment in the now while imagining and pursuing the future.

For example, she imagines herself Someday unearthing dinosaur bones and being featured on the news. Today, by contrast, she is”digging for coins under the sofa cushions.” She also fantasizes Someday befriending dolphins and learning “all the secrets of the sea” from them. This contrasts with a Today in which she feeds her goldfish who remain silent keeping their secrets to themselves.

Someday is a pleasant read that invites the reader’s imagination to soar while it reminds them to enjoy the delights of the present moments. Five stars

AQ Lens: This is a great book for adoptive families to read. Its very premise invites exploration of the future, the present and how one can build on the other. It can be an easy segue to invite a child to consider their past and how they can hold both a reality=based awareness of what occurred as well as their own ideas about how they wish it might have been different. This is not an effort to deny or diminish any trauma but rather to affirm what the child should have experienced. (In a previous blog, which i wrote for GIFT Family Services, we explored the power of therapeutic narratives. “You may wonder how reading books differs from sharing a therapeutic narrative. Denise B. Lacher wrote a terrific book on the subject: Connecting with Kids Through Stories: Using Narratives to Facilitate Attachment in Adopted Children“

Written by Megan Wagner Lloyd Finding Wild was illustrated by Abigail Halpin who brilliantly captures the unbridled, untamed, free spirited energy of life. Ostensibly about the wildness of nature, it’s about so much more than that, more than wild creatures in their natural habitat, more than locations unchanged by humans. It is scent and sound, places and dreams, full of challenge and possibility, risks and rewards. It is determination and persistence. It is flowers growing in sidewalk cracks, trees shattering through boulders doggedly pursuing survival. Life thriving under the most inhospitable of circumstances. It is indomitable human spirit. Though the text is brief, the possibilities it suggests are immense.

AQ Lens: This book also is an excellent potential conversation starter for adoptive families. Kids feel freer to explore a story that is not overtly their own yet may bear similarities in terms of difficulties, danger or survival. This added layer of dissociation enables them to explore events without fully awakening their own struggles, tough situations, harsh circumstances. Tread lightly. Let kids take the lead. Unless kids choose to speak of their personal events, focus conversation of how “some kids” faced these challenges and survived.

Freedom Summer by Deborah Wiles and illustrated by Jerome Lagarrigue won both the 2002 Ezra Jack Keats Award as well as a Coretta Scott King Award. It begins with two friends enjoying the leisurely pace of summer, hanging around, being friends together, swimming in a local creek. “John Henry swims better than anybody” the narrator knows. They ecstatically anticipate the prospect of the local community pool’s opening day. But, when they arrive at the gates, the boys discover that the facility has been bulldozed. No one will swim there again.

Why?

Because this story takes place in a segregated America. In 1960, laws ensured blacks could not share facilities with whites. After desegregation legislation passed, instead of complying, Mobile, Alabama opted to close the town pool, ice cream parlor, and roller rink. Hate and prejudice blinded people to fairness and the rights of all citizens to equality and access to facilities. To deny blacks access, they denied the entire community access.

This award-winning book splendidly captures the boys’ friendship so when they encounter the closed pool, the reader feels dazed by the community’s betrayal. The conversations this book might open are important one on issues such as racism, prejudice as well as loyalty, friendship and thinking for oneself.

The forward by the other offers additional insights about her motives for writing the book as well as her personal encounters with segregation during her own childhood.

AQ Lens:

The potential for adoption-related conversations is broad. In addition to racial and cultural bias, adoptive families frequently encounter bias against their families. Our family ties are often questions in terms of permanency, depth and reality. This book can help families talk about standing up for ourselves as well as being a voice for others who face discrimination and bias.

Wolf Camp written and illustrated by Andrea Zuill will delight both adults and young readers. Zany illustrations ripe with energy and humor chronicle the journey of one lovable dog as he tries to get in touch with his inner wolf. His fellow campers include a charming group of canine companions–a chihuahua named Pixie and a golden retriever named Rex. Together they learn to punch through fear, master new skills and make new friends and pull together–all admirable tasks whether you are a dog or a human!

One illustration depicts Homer’s letter to home. It’s a classic. Any parent who’s sent kids to camp has probably received a similar letter. Wolf Camp is a delight with an important–and very subtle–message about daring to face fears, take on new experiences, make new friends, and grow into a stronger person.

AQ Lens:

Like the other books reviewed in this post, readers will see the value of friendship, the benefit of being open instead of limited by bias and the willingness to dare–to be stronger, braver and more open-minded. These are great lessons for all kids but especially for adopted children who throughout their lives will frequently be treated as “other” simply because they were adopted.

The conversations which this book might open can include topics like defeating fear, trying new things, and walking in the “shoes” of others.

Tall Tales Can Be Tell Tale Windows to the Heart

This post reviews

H.O.R.S.E. by Christopher Myers and Imani’s Moon by JaNay Brown-Wood

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H.O.R.S.E. written and illustrated by multi-award-winning author, Christopher Myers riffs on the tall tale tradition of folk heroes like Paul Bunyan. It also connects to kid’s admiration of contemporary basketball heroes. One part poetry and ten parts hyperbolic imagination, this delightful book entertains and inspires.written and illustrated by multi-award-winning author, Christopher Myers connects to kid’s admiration of contemporary basketball heroes. One part poetry and ten parts hyperbolic imagination, this delightful book entertains and inspires.

Kids will get discern the difference between utter fantasy and all out fun. They’ll also see their own thoughts about wanting to be the best, the champion that outshines all the competition. Readers will delight in the dare-and-double-dare s exchanged between the two characters as each tries to out shine the other’s assertion of superiority. The chest-puffing story unfolds with good humor and a complete absence of bullying and intimidation.

The text of H.O.R.S.E. is a visual delight as it twists and spins, bounces and stretches across the pages. The illustrations enhance the soaring and exaggerated words in a perfect partnership of color, stroke and energy.

The accompanying CD delivers are vibrant narration of alternating voices which bring the story to life and offer a listening treat for readers.

Imani’s Moon by JaNay Brown-Wood touches on a topic all too familiar to children: teasing or bullying. Imani is unusually small and the other children in her village tease her about her diminutive size and disparage her efforts to accomplish things. Their dismissive taunts hurt but Imani is unbroken. Instead, she is galvanized into action. Determined to outshine her larger–and less compassionate–peers, Imani sets a goal and then doggedly pursues it.

Mimicking her tribes famous jumping dance the adumu, Imani practices and practices jumping as she strives to achieves her goal of touching the moon. Readers will enjoy Imani’s spunk and can identify with wanting to prove themselves. The taste of Masai culture is an added bonus. Vividly colored illustrations serve the story well.

Imani’s Moon has won Children’s Book of the Year Principal’s Award from the National Association of Elementary School Principals.

#AAQ Spin: Adoptees have the unique experience of knowing their lives might have been vastly different had they been raised by their birth families instead of being adopted. This reality lends itself to wondering various possible scenarios of their alternate, “unadopted” lives. Sometimes these thoughts are wildly thrilling and include royal lineage, lavish wealth and indulgent parents. Sometimes these fantasies can be more conservative while other versions may include dire circumstances, and tragic figures.

A light-hearted story like this one could segue into conversations that explore how they might spin a tall tale about their own lives. Adoption needn’t be mentioned but it might seep into the story at the edges. Parents can assess if it makes sense to insert it into the discussion.

Discaimer: I won these books and have received no compensation in exchange for these unbiased reviews.

Memories: Powerful, Evocative and Revealing

Even very young children recognize the signal phrase, Once upon a time so when they read Nina Laden’s evocative picture book Once upon a Memory, they will intuitively prepare for a magical story. The gorgeous illustrations by Renata Liwska have a soft-focus, watercolor-type glow that perfectly serve the story and capture a dreamy, time-traveling mood. Detailed drawings expand the spare text and invite further exploration of the thematic ideas.

Simple rhymes lilt softly on the ear, enhance the dreamy mood and encourage young readers to explore beyond the obvious into their own personal experiences. Colored font highlights key words and further spotlights the connection between the item in its current state back through time to a former state. For example,

“Does a feather remember it once was … a bird?”

Each page offers a chance to delve deeper into the questions and discuss how change occurs in people, places and things. One could simply enjoy this wonderful chance to ride the magic carpet of imagination and fantasy. Or one could use it as a path to some simple STEM activities—science, technology, engineering and mathematics.

AQ Lens: For adopted children this book can offer a path to conversations about their past. For example, the final pairing, “Will you remember you once were … a child?” could naturally evolve into discussing their thoughts about their life story before they were adopted. Older children might wish to express any what-if thoughts about how their lives might have been different had they never been adopted, or if they’d been adopted by other parents.

(Many adult adoptees say they had these thoughts but felt afraid or unwelcome to share these somewhat scary and unsettling thoughts with their adoptive families because they did not want to hurt their adoptive parents and/or seem disloyal.}

Parents can nudge children towards a conversation like this through indirect questions like, “Some kids (note the absence of reference to adoption,) wonder how events in their lives might be different, for example, if they didn’t have their family pet…” Kids can then decide if they want to make the conversation real personal or keep it general.

Sharing a book like Once upon a Memory, reassures a child that his thoughts are safe to share and allows parents to comfort and reassure their child with unconditional love and acceptance. While it can be awkward to have such Difficult Conversations, it is important to do so. And to offer the possibility on a regular basis.

We never want to force a child to talk but it is essential that we sincerely convey are willingness to do so as well as our ability to be strong enough to hear our children’s thoughts. Don’t mistake a child’s resistance as disinterest. (And please do not breathe an audible sigh of relief when they decline to talk about adoption “stuff”. Parent and child both need courage, empathy, and compassion.) Use your best adoption-attuned intuition to identify what is behind their reluctance. They may simply need more convincing that our invitation is genuine or may not be ready at that moment. Children are interested–and probably a bit wary and uncomfortable–but they still benefit from such conversations.